In my previous blogs in the Healthy Pregnancy series, I wrote on pregnancy as being a happy, a relatively complication-free event and shared with you a range of exercises as well as some basic principles on the food front to help maintain your well-being. But it also seems relevant to say something, however brief, in the event of an unwanted pregnancy.
Each woman’s set of circumstances is unique to her and ultimately, the decision on what course of action to adopt should be hers and hers only. It is not to mean that her partner, family and friends will not help inform this decision but she will be the one accepting or declining the consequences and responsibilities of giving birth to and caring for a child.
Some women will chose to go ahead with their pregnancy despite their initial reluctance because of their personal set of values or religious beliefs while some women will chose to end their pregnancy for various possible reasons such as not feeling ready for motherhood, a noncommittal or absent partner and not wanting to do it alone, or not having a structure in place deemed stable enough.
We all know someone - a friend, a relative, you - who found herself walking one day into hospital to get an abortion. It is a hugely controversial debate which I won’t go into. I will just say that it is not an experience that any woman would ever wish to go through.
The shock to the mind, body and spirit is intensely real and it is very important to get sufficient support.
If you are the one going through such a challenging time in your life, guilt, resentment, anger, doubt, sadness, despair and a sense of relief will probably keep taking turn in your mind and heart for a while.
When feeling overwhelmed with any of these emotions, remind yourself to be kind and compassionate towards yourself. No one is entitled to judge you - we have all found ourselves at cross-roads before. Allow yourself plenty of time to process what happened and ultimately forgive yourself, learning to trust life/the universe - or whatever you feel comfortable calling it - all over again.